A Few Words About the Burial

A Few Words on Burial #

In churches we often witness a sorrowful scene. Relatives come to arrange the burial of an Orthodox Old Believer. And the first, entirely reasonable question from the standpoint of a believer—“Who was the spiritual father of the deceased?”—throws them into confusion. The second question, “When was the last time he went to confession?” prompts them to start calling around to other relatives. Their grandmother or grandfather had been bedridden for a long time, had previously attended church, but no one can remember which church, or when they last went. And it turns out that the relatives themselves were “properly baptized” at some point by someone, but now they attend “a regular church—after all, God is the same everywhere.”

The conversation about “God being the same everywhere” is a separate and difficult topic. Here, in this article, we will briefly answer the main questions posed by relatives of Old Believers who come to the church to arrange a burial. Perhaps this simple material will come to the attention of the loved ones of elderly and infirm Old Believers and prompt them to take timely care for the eternal fate of their kin. It may also be useful to church clergy who find themselves needing to explain to descendants of Old Believers—who have become disconnected from their roots—what must be done in such a sorrowful situation.

The death of a loved one is always a great sorrow. It feels as though the world stops, and we are powerless to change anything. For the departed, this is indeed the case. The time when they could do something has ended. But we, the living, can still do unspeakably much for them. The first and most important task is to arrange for a burial according to Orthodox tradition.

What Needs to Be Done First #

The Church is strongly opposed to postmortem examinations. The Consecrated Council of 2017 reminded the faithful that in most cases they have the right to refuse an autopsy. To do this, a written statement should be made during one’s lifetime; after death, a refusal can be written by close relatives. Cremation of the body is entirely incompatible with Orthodox tradition.

There are also traditional rites for washing the body of the deceased and laying it in the coffin. Whenever possible, it is desirable to observe these traditions.

A person who has died in the faith is dressed in the coffin just as they would have dressed for prayer in church during life. Men are clothed in a shirt and trousers; women—in a shirt, a sarafan, a povoynik (if the woman was crowned in marriage), and a headscarf. Soft shoes are placed on the feet. A cross must be worn around the neck. The coffin is lined with a specially prepared burial shroud, and the body of the deceased is laid in this shroud.

The shroud (savan) is a length of white cotton or linen fabric, twice the height of the deceased and about a meter wide. It is folded in half and sewn along one long edge to form a kind of long mantle or hood that reaches to the heels. The part that goes over the head is stitched along the fold with strong thread. Pulling this thread gathers the fabric at the crown so that the edges of the shroud frame the face of the departed. These edges are usually trimmed with lace or a decorative hem.

The hands of the deceased are laid crosswise on the chest, the right hand over the left, and the fingers of both hands are arranged in the two-fingered sign (dvuperstie), as for making the sign of the cross. A new lestovka (Old Believer prayer rope) is placed in the left hand.

Next, a narrow white ribbon about five meters long is passed beneath the deceased’s head. The two long ends are wrapped around the body three times so that three crosses are formed on the front of the body: one on the chest, where the hands are folded; the second on the thighs; the third on the knees. The remaining ends of the ribbon are wrapped around the legs.

In church, a small wreath (venchik) bearing three crosses and a prayer is placed on the forehead of the deceased as a sign of our faith in the Holy Trinity and in the promise that those who have kept God’s commandments will receive their reward.

At Home or in Church #

Burial is usually performed on the third day after death. Until then, the coffin remains either at home or in church. At home, the coffin is placed in a room with the krasny ugol (the “red corner,” where the icons are located). The deceased is positioned facing the icons. A small icon is also placed in the hands of the deceased.

To perform the burial rite, the coffin with the body is brought into the church. There, prayers are offered for the deceased, commonly known among the faithful as the panikhida or “funeral service.” Relatives are encouraged to be present in church during this time. Unlike pagan funeral customs, which involved loud weeping over many days, the Christian burial instills hope in a better future for the one who died in the faith and encourages us, sinners, to walk the path of salvation. If bringing the deceased to church is impossible, then the prescribed prayers may be read by the priest in absentia.

The burial service is generally performed by the spiritual father of the deceased—that is, the priest who heard their confession. If, for any reason, the spiritual father is unable to attend, then his blessing is still required. The burial rite is performed only for Orthodox Christians—that is, those who were baptized by full immersion, who attended church, confessed their sins, and partook of the Holy Mysteries. It is therefore very important that we see to it, while our loved ones are still alive—especially those who are elderly or infirm—that they confess and receive Communion. If someone has not gone to confession for more than a year, they may be denied an Orthodox burial.

Who Is Deprived of Church Burial #

Those who are deprived of Church burial include:

Unbelievers in the One God, in the Resurrection of Christ, and in the general resurrection of the dead, and those who consciously hold to destructive heresies.
Sorcerers, enchanters, fortune-tellers, palm readers, astrologers, practitioners of spiritism, and the like—if they do not repent and do not undergo a penance (epitimia).
Suicides, for they have voluntarily rejected the life given to them by God.
Those are also considered suicides who, seeing obvious danger to their lives—for example, great waves in a river, raging fire, bitter cold—and, ignoring the danger without any rational cause (i.e., not for the sake of saving others, but to show off their bravery, recklessness, or to win a bet, or in drunkenness), throw themselves into the water, or into the fire, or go out lightly dressed in severe frost and perish as a result.
Those who die from alcohol, drugs, or a fatal blow during a fight instigated by rage, revenge, or bravado; or who choke on food, drink, or bones due to gluttony or making jest during meals—these, too, are classified as suicides.
Those who deliberately inflicted wounds upon themselves that led to death.
A person is not considered a suicide if they took their own life due to the coercion or persuasion of others, or from despair caused by constant abuse, humiliation, or deprivation.

What Is Prayed for During Burial #

The central part of the burial rite, as in other memorial services, is the 17th Kathisma (Psalm 118 of the Prophet David). This psalm presents us with a model of life in God and for God. We read it at the burial with the faith that our brother or sister, who has departed in the Lord, has lived their life worthily, and that their path beyond the grave will be a continuation of their blessed earthly pilgrimage.

The essence of the prayers read at the burial is that all our care for earthly vanity—wealth, fame, honor—ultimately ends at the boundary of death.

The Apostle and the Gospel proclaim that death, which we now face, is for the true believer in Christ nothing but sleep. The body, formed by God from the dust of the earth, now returns to its original state—it becomes earth again. Yet, in obedience to God’s command, it will rise again at His second coming and be reunited with the soul, to live forever in the Kingdom of God.

If the priest does not accompany the coffin to the grave, then the final farewell is performed in the church. The loved ones approach the coffin two at a time, from the left side—first to the cross, then to the departed. Without making the sign of the cross, they offer two deep bows to the ground:

Forgive me, [name of the departed], for the sake of Christ (bow to the ground without the sign of the cross).
And may God forgive you (bow to the ground without the sign of the cross, then make the sign of the cross and kiss the venchik and icon).
If you attain boldness before the Lord, pray for me, a sinner (bow to the ground without the sign of the cross).

After this farewell, the priest, on behalf of the spiritual father, reads the prayer of absolution and places into the hand of the deceased the so-called gramota (absolution certificate). Some attribute to this paper an exaggerated significance, calling it a “pass to the next life.” The gramota does indeed hold importance, for by it the priest remits the vows of the deceased before God—the sins which he repented of in confession and with which he sincerely struggled. By the authority given to him by God (“whatsoever ye shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven; and whatsoever ye shall loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven”), the priest forgives the sins of the departed in which they had repented, so that the soul may pass unhindered to bow before its Creator.

Yet what matters is not so much the paper itself as the prayer that is read. That prayer is the fruit of the spiritual labors of the departed—his cleansing from transgressions. But cleansing is granted only to one who strove for purity in life, and only from those sins which the departed sought to cast off during their earthly journey.

Arranging the Grave #

The burial place of the departed is, first and foremost, a place where prayer will be offered on their behalf. The deceased is laid facing east, as a sign of faith in the Resurrection of Christ and in expectation of the universal resurrection of the dead. At the foot of the grave, an eight-pointed cross is erected. The grave should be well tended—this is a sign of our respect for the departed. But our departed loved ones have no need for flowers or wreaths, nor for paving stones or flowerbeds; what they need is prayer. Therefore, the most important thing that should be at the cemetery is the cross, before which one can pray. When we are physically close to the resting place of our reposed loved ones, our mind and heart are more deeply engaged in the meaning of prayer.

Some people think that frequent visits to the cemetery “disturb the dead.” Such a notion can hardly be called Orthodox. We are unlikely to disturb the souls of the departed—especially if we visit the cemetery to pray for them.

The Third, Ninth, and Fortieth Day #

According to the tradition of the Holy Fathers, after the soul is separated from the body, it is tested by demons concerning the sins committed during its life. The most hardened and impious souls are seized at once by demons and carried into the abyss. Other souls, guarded by holy angels, give account of their deeds and are brought on the third day to venerate the throne of God.

After this, the angels again lead the soul through the world, showing it its evil and good deeds, recalling days, hours, and faces. On the ninth day, the soul comes again to venerate God. Then the angels show it the afterlife: the places of the righteous and their blessedness, and the torments and sufferings of the wicked.

On the fortieth day after death, the soul undergoes judgment. It hears God’s verdict regarding its eternal fate. A soul adorned with virtue is established in a place of rest until the general resurrection of the dead. The soul of a sinner is cast into the prisons of hell, where, with sighing and weeping, it awaits the day of resurrection and the Dread Judgment, at which point it will be sent into eternal torment with its body.

Yet even after this period, God’s mercy does not abandon the soul without hope, even if it has been condemned to suffering by its own deeds. Hope remains until the very Day of Judgment, for the Lord desires not the death of any soul that has had even the smallest spark of right faith or virtue. The faults and sins of such a person, even if great, may be made up for by their loved ones—through prayer, almsgiving, and good deeds.

Prayer for the Departed at Home and in Church #

Proskomedia. At every Divine Liturgy, the priest in the altar commemorates departed Orthodox Christians. You may submit a note “for the proskomedia”—in the altar, the priest will remove a particle from the prosphora while praying for the soul of the departed. This is the most important form of commemoration, since the departed thereby becomes part of the Church’s most sacred mystery: Holy Communion.

Ektenia. At certain moments in the church service, petitions for the repose of the departed are made. To have a loved one commemorated in this way, one may submit a note “for the ektenia.” To ensure remembrance at all services throughout the year, one may request a yearly commemoration.

Litiya is a brief church service specifically dedicated to praying for the repose of one or more souls.

Panikhida. On the fortieth day after death, on the anniversary, or on the nameday of the deceased—especially when the proskomedia cannot be performed—it is customary to pray the panikhida. A panikhida may be served at home or in church, with or without a priest. Every panikhida concludes with a litiya.

Canon for the Departed is a shortened version of the panikhida. During the forty days following death, the relatives of the departed try to pray the canon daily. One may also ask the clergy to read the forty canons in church on their behalf.

The Psalter. Until the body is laid in the ground, it is customary to read the Psalter continuously over it. Some devout relatives continue reading the Psalter even after burial, striving to read it forty times by the fortieth day. You may also request this “sorokoust” commemoration from church clergy.

How Much Does It Cost? #

All treby (liturgical services), including burial, are typically performed free of charge. In memory of the departed, you may offer a donation to the church or priest—whatever your heart moves you to give and your means allow. In some churches, symbolic fees may be requested for notes or services, but even then the amount listed is considered a donation. If you are able, you may give more than the suggested amount. However, if you are unable to make a donation, you will not be refused burial or commemoration for your relatives.

Lighting a Candle #

A candle is our offering to God. It may be placed in the church or lit at home. Memorial services are performed before what is known as the panikhida table—a table with sockets for candles, on which a crucifix is set. Candles may be placed here during any service, including festive ones. One way or another, the faithful departed are commemorated at every service—this affirms the unity of the Church on earth and the Church in heaven.

Days of Commemoration for the Departed #

Every Saturday is traditionally considered a day for commemorating the dead. On specific Saturdays throughout the year, the Church services are wholly dedicated to the departed:

Universal (Meatfare) Saturday of the Dead,
Universal (Pentecost) Saturday of the Dead,
Dmitry’s Saturday of the Dead,
The second, third, and fourth Saturdays of Great Lent.

To these commemorative days is also added Radonitsa—the Tuesday of Thomas Week (the week after Pascha).

What Else Can I Do? #

The most important thing is to try—even in a small way—to change your life for the better in memory of the departed. Become kinder, more patient, more attentive to those in need and to the suffering of others. If the memory of our departed loved ones makes us better people, this is more precious to God than candles or a hundred spoken prayers.

Almsgiving. In memory of the deceased, especially in the first forty days, it is customary to give generous alms. This may include food, money, or useful items. These may be given to anyone in need: brought to the church, passed to the priest, shared with poor neighbors, or offered to beggars on the street.

Offering to the Church. At every service, prayers are offered for the “builders of this church.” Your offering, made in memory of a relative, includes that person among the benefactors of the church—even after death.

Memorial Meal — this too is a form of almsgiving. However, it should be conducted with the utmost reverence. If the memorial meal falls on a fasting day, the menu must be strictly fasting. If it is difficult to prepare a fasting table, it is better to reschedule the meal for another day.

What Should Not Be Done #

Placing objects or written notes in the coffin to be “sent to the next world”
Putting alcohol on the memorial table
Placing a shot glass and bread next to the photograph of the deceased
Giving cigarettes or alcohol as alms
Leaving pancakes, sweets, or other food “for the deceased” at the cemetery

The Fortieth Day Has Passed — What Then? #

After the fortieth day, two special dates become primary days of remembrance for the departed: the date of their death and the feast day of their patron saint (their name day). On these days, you may ask for prayers in church and bring some food to the temple for the clergy in memory of the deceased.

At home, you can pray daily for the repose of the departed. During any church service, you can light a candle in their memory. Your efforts on behalf of the departed are always of inestimable value, for the time when they could act on their own behalf has ended. Your prayer gives unspeakable joy to a righteous soul and brings relief to a soul burdened by sin.

In some families, commemoration books (pomjanniki) are kept, in which the entire family line is recorded. These books are passed down through generations, and great-grandchildren pray for their great-grandparents with the hope that their own children will one day bring the same family list to church.

If you have elderly relatives or those in poor health who cannot come to church on their own, take care to arrange for a priest to visit them.

Every Christian should have a spiritual father—a priest who hears their confession, offers spiritual guidance, and helps them build a life of faith. By tradition, Christians come to confession four times a year during the fasts. If your loved ones cannot do this themselves, invite a priest to visit them at home. Today, priests are permitted to visit the sick even in hospitals, including intensive care units. Confession brings peace to the soul, and Communion strengthens both soul and body. Sometimes this one visit becomes decisive in determining the eternal fate of our loved ones.

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