Sometimes you feel an inexplicable dislike for someone. What is the cause, and how can this be addressed? #

If you feel an aversion toward a particular person, it means they are negatively affecting certain emotions or passions within you. All of us harbor many sins which, as they accumulate and linger, eventually develop into passions. However, these passions lie dormant until something stirs them.

Every illness is treated only after it manifests itself. If passions did not reveal themselves, we would remain unaware of their existence. Thus, a person who inexplicably irritates us is sent by God to awaken us, to make us recognize our sins. Instead of identifying and working on our own sins, we often focus on the perceived faults of the other person. Rather than acknowledging our flaws and striving to correct them, we attempt to change and judge the person who irritates us. We prefer to be in an environment where we are praised and our behavior is affirmed. Yet the Lord said:

“Woe unto you, when all men shall speak well of you! For so did their fathers to the false prophets.”
— Luke 6:26

We need trials and challenges to train and strengthen our spirit, just as exposure to various viruses keeps our immune system active and resilient.

It is necessary to accept the person who causes us discomfort as they are. We readily accept ourselves, excusing our sinful actions. The Lord said:

“Love thy neighbor as thyself.”
— Matthew 19:19

Making an effort to improve our attitude toward such a person is, in itself, an act of mercy. We often think only of ourselves, forgetting that we too may unintentionally irritate others.

Initially, it may help to reduce interactions with the person who irritates us. If that is not possible, begin praying for them. The more you compel yourself to pray for them, the sooner your irritability will dissipate.

“Bear ye one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.”
— Galatians 6:2

— Priest Evgeny Gureev.