The Mystery of Repentance #

Sin and Repentance #

The feeling of repentance is, to some degree, familiar to everyone. In human life, it manifests in a wide variety of forms and expressions. It may be a simple “forgive me” addressed to a loved one, or a polite “excuse me, please” for others, or even a lighthearted “pardon,” as well as certain understandable gestures. All these signs in human interaction serve to express our regret over something that has happened—over a mistake we’ve made or some harm we have caused. Why are they needed? Clearly, they serve to testify to our sorrow over what occurred, to cleanse our conscience. Repentance, as such, is a gesture or act of spiritual cleansing, arising from the desire to atone for some guilt before others, to reconcile with them and with our own conscience. We intuitively feel that our guilt before another person creates a barrier in our relationship with them, and, overcoming shame, we force ourselves to confess our fault, thereby removing the barrier we ourselves have created.

However, we are incomparably more guilty before God when we sin and transgress His holy will. Every conscious violation of God’s commandments—what we call sin—is, in essence, a transgression against God. And every sin raises a barrier in our relationship with Him; each sin calls for atonement.

Man has been endowed by God with free will and chooses his path in life. Of his own volition, he may do good or commit evil. Though many people try to justify themselves by blaming their sins on the devil, this is unjust. Satan cannot force anyone to sin. He usually acts through cunning or deception, tempting us with the apparent “profitability” of sin or the anticipation of sinful pleasure. But a person is always capable, if he wills, of recognizing that what is being offered—whether by another or by his own thoughts—is sinful. And if he does not withstand temptation and breaks God’s commandment, this act means he has voluntarily rejected God’s will and fulfilled the will of the devil, offering him a sacrifice.

It often happens that a person who repeatedly falls into grave sins cannot by himself change his corrupt way of life. No matter how often he resolves to “start a new life,” the devil, with characteristic craftiness and guile, always finds a way to bring him back into sin. This happens because the soul, burdened with many willfully committed transgressions, is deprived of divine help and falls under the devil’s influence.

The only means of breaking free from this vicious cycle, from this demonic captivity, is the sacrament of repentance, which restores to man God’s mercy and His saving grace. And the devil, seeing the repentant sinner kneeling before God, is humiliated and loses his power over that person.

This is why the devil seeks at all costs to prevent a Christian from coming to repentance. He raises a mountain of large and small obstacles and excuses along the way. And due to such diabolical delusion, many people today live with full confidence that they have nothing to repent of at all… Worse still, even the natural sense of guilt—reminding us of our unpaid debts or rash actions—is often viewed today as an annoying hindrance to a “normal” and successful life. Even when a person commits a serious crime, he often seeks to justify himself by external circumstances that “forced” him to do wrong. We tend to blame everything on society, on a difficult childhood, on bad teachers: “It’s not our fault—we’re just products of life!” Our personal responsibility for the collective evil seems vanishingly small to us. We are almost convinced we’re not guilty at all—we’re just going with the flow, trying not to miss whatever comes into our hands.

Others take an even more cynical view: after all, they say, we didn’t come into this world by our own choice, and we’ll probably leave it the same way—so let Him who started all this take responsibility for it!

And as for those who are sure that He doesn’t exist at all—such people have even less reason to worry: just live for your own pleasure and use whatever opportunities (granted by no one knows whom) to the fullest…

How familiar this attitude is! Yet it is vitally important not to fall into this devilish trap. We must remember that no one—whether believing or unbelieving, God-fearing or defiant—can escape the judgment of God, regardless of their wishes. The Lord is the Creator of the entire world, and therefore He has the unquestionable right to demand from His creation—from each and every individual—a full and honest account of his life.

Most people, of course, acknowledge that yes, we will answer for our lives, and that sin may bring punishment… But how frightening is that, really? What is sin, and how will we answer for it? How can our sins be atoned for? How can we lighten our future judgment before God? How can we learn to avoid sin?

Clinging to every soul, Satan strives to use all his deceit to seduce it. He whispers to millions of people that there’s no rush to go to church, that there’s still time to repent… And how many souls—seemingly believers in Christ, who pledged themselves to God in the sacrament of holy Baptism, who know of eternal hell and do not deny repentance—nonetheless leave this world and stand before God unrepentant, because day after day they postponed this most essential act to an ever more distant “tomorrow.”

Reconciliation With God #

The Holy Fathers explain to us that in every sin, even an involuntary one, there is always an element of human guilt. If there were no guilt, there would be no sin. And every sin is a transgression against God.

A person almost always has the opportunity to avoid sin, but often neglects it. With every sinful act, a person makes yet another soul-destroying concession to Satan, and thereby not only deprives himself of the hope of future blessedness in eternity, but also voluntarily withdraws from God, rejects His gracious Divine help in this earthly life, and moreover, kindles the wrath of God against himself.

But the Lord is long-suffering and does not hasten to pour out the cup of His righteous wrath upon sinners. He waits for each one who has sinned to return to Him, to acknowledge his errors and sins, to offer heartfelt repentance for what has been done, and to make an effort to amend the course of his life.

Yet how many people today remain entrenched in their habitual state of deep sin and make no haste to unburden their soul through repentance! At times they not only feel no concern for their many sins but no longer even recognize what constitutes a sin—and have no desire to learn. Each such person seriously risks drinking the cup of God’s wrath even in this present life. But the punishment to come for unrepented sins—eternal torment—is incomparably more dreadful than any suffering or misfortune that may befall us on earth. And only repentance can save each of us from eternal perdition.

To reconcile the sinner with God, to return to him the hope of salvation in eternity, to guide him on the path of a virtuous Christian life, and to lighten the burden of sin weighing on his soul, the Church has from ancient times preserved the Sacrament of Repentance. It is this sacrament, performed according to the Order of Confession, that is the most significant means for purifying the human soul from sinful corruption. This sacrament of the Church helps a person to rise up from the depths of sin and draw nearer to God. Regular participation in confession teaches a person to live his entire life in harmony with the will of God and his own conscience.

Each Christian’s participation in the Sacrament of Repentance must be conscious and intentional. For this reason, the Order of Confession has, since ancient times, included various teachings and admonitions addressed to the penitent. These instructions are intended to help Christians who come to confession recognize their sins, repent of them, and begin the work of improving their spiritual lives.

Unlike many other sacraments, the Sacrament of Repentance can and must be received repeatedly throughout one’s life. It is precisely through regular participation in confession that each believer confirms his membership in the Church of Christ. But one who does not partake in the sacraments of the Church—and above all, in the Sacrament of Repentance—by that very neglect, effectively excludes himself from the Church of God.

Anyone who still has even a spark of the fear of God should not live his Christian life without repentance, for our sins accumulate daily, and as the Holy Fathers say, not a single day passes in which we do not sin. A good Christian custom calls us to cleanse our soul through confession during each of the four fasts. But at the very least, one must not neglect the opportunity for confession during Great Lent, when the entire focus of the Church’s services reminds us of repentance.

Those who go long without confession—even if they strive to live piously by their own understanding—make their spiritual efforts of little benefit. And those who have never confessed, who have no spiritual father, who do not strive to recognize their sins, who show no concern for overcoming their sinful weaknesses and attachments—such a person clearly rejects the most essential Christian practices, and thus must be acknowledged as an apostate from the Holy Church. If such a person pridefully calls himself an “Orthodox Christian,” or even more—an “Old Believer,” then it is either an outright lie or a cruel delusion! To believe that a single properly administered Baptism alone is enough for a person to be called a Christian and inherit salvation is entirely mistaken: for the Lord clearly says through the Apostle that “sinners shall not inherit the Kingdom of God”! That is why every Christian is called to confirm this sacred title by daily diligence in keeping God’s commandments, by every good deed of his life, and by sincere repentance of his sins.

Healing of Sinful Ailments #

In order for repentance to benefit us, we must first submit ourselves to the judgment of our own conscience. Let us go back through the days of our life in memory, recall all our misdeeds, wicked actions, foul words, sinful thoughts and desires; let us reflect on all we have done contrary to the commandments of God—and in so doing, attempt to break the shell of self-complacency and become deeply aware of just how numerous and grave our sins truly are.

To struggle effectively against sin, it is crucial to have a correct understanding of its inner causes. Just as every plant has a hidden root system beneath the surface that nourishes it, so too every sinful deed of a person cannot be explained by mere chance—it is always the result of some internal cause rooted in the depths of the mind. At times, these inner causes of sin—called passions—may remain unknown even to the person himself, although it is precisely they that lead him to one sin or another. In this sense, a person arrives at sin gradually.¹ This is why the Holy Fathers placed great importance on learning to discern one’s inner thoughts and movements of the soul, so as to recognize in time the beginnings of any given passion.

The countless multitude of sins can ultimately be traced to a rather limited list of sinful passions that give rise to them. The most important of these are: pride, lust, greed, gluttony, anger, hatred, and despondency. Therefore, it is necessary to distinguish between sins and passions, and to understand how to combat both. Venerable Abba Dorotheos explains this distinction: “Passions and sins are not the same. Passions are: anger, vanity, hatred, and the like. Sins are the actual deeds of the passions, when someone acts upon them in practice—that is, when he carries out with his body the actions to which the passions urge him (for it is possible to have passions and yet not act according to them).”

If a person has no desire for a certain sin, he can easily avoid it, even if Satan tempts him. On the other hand, if he is wounded by a particular attachment, he is constantly at risk of committing that sin. Thus, in a certain sense, sins are incidental, while passions can dwell in the soul for a long time—sometimes permanently.

It often happens that passions live in the soul for a long time without manifesting themselves through specific sins—until a suitable occasion arises. Until then, passions seem to “slumber” in the soul. However, this should never serve as an excuse for complacency, because we do not know when they will awaken or what destruction their awakening will bring. Just as in hunting, it is easier to deal with a dangerous beast while it sleeps than when it has awakened and launched an attack, so too in spiritual warfare must Christians strive to overcome (or “cut off”) passions before they lead to sin.

It is important to be able—at least roughly—to identify which passions give rise to particular sins. For example: theft stems from greed, laziness and drunkenness from gluttony, murder and all forms of cruelty from hatred or anger, judgmentalism and arrogance from vanity or pride, lying from vanity or greed, and so forth.

In order to reliably avoid sins, one must learn to systematically combat the passions that give rise to them. Each passion stands in opposition to a particular virtue—and it is precisely through this virtue that it may be healed, like an illness by its remedy. The passion of pride is healed by humility and self-abasement; anger, by meekness and compassion; greed, by mercy and almsgiving; faintheartedness, by patience; vanity, by self-effacement; hatred, by concern for others and the acquisition of love; gluttony and lust, by abstinence.

For example, to overcome the sin of theft, which arises from the passion of greed, one should diligently give alms (preferably in secret); then little by little, the temptation will fade, and the sinful passion will eventually be conquered. To combat the sin of judgment, which most often arises from vanity, one must train in self-abasement, lowering one’s self-estimation, striving to focus on the good deeds and virtues of others, and approaching oneself, on the contrary, with self-critical vigilance. Great benefit can be gained from frequently recalling one’s own sins, and from daily prayer for those whom we judge or with whom we are not at peace.

Therefore, if one desires to be free of a particular sin, one must first and foremost strive against the passion that gives rise to it.

Venerable Symeon the New Theologian writes, for example: “He who longs for money is condemned as a lover of silver, even if he owns absolutely nothing.” Likewise, the Lord will judge each of us for our sinful attachments no less strictly than for the actual sins themselves.

In this work of “moral weeding,” it is very important to remove from the depths of the soul every weed of sin, striving to pull it out by the root. If even one sinful root remains, it will soon sprout again and become even more deeply entrenched. However, once we have entered into battle against the tempter—the devil—we must not deceive ourselves into thinking we can overcome him easily on our own. Man is weak by nature and, without the grace-filled help of God, is often powerless to succeed in virtue. Therefore, the work of spiritual growth must be founded not on self-reliance, but on sincere repentance of our sins, accomplished through the help of God in the Church’s sacrament of repentance.

The Holy Fathers #

Calling all to a life of virtue, Venerable Ephraim the Syrian writes: “Beloved, do you withdraw from fire, lest your body be burned? Then flee from sin, so that both your body and your soul may not burn together in the unquenchable fire.” Another elder said: “A wondrous thing! When we offer prayers, we do so as though God is present and listening to our words; yet when we sin, we act as if He does not see us.”

In order to learn to better identify our moral and spiritual shortcomings, and to correct them more diligently, we must frequently turn to Holy Scripture—as to a kind of spiritual mirror, which helps us discern the blemishes upon our inner image. It often happens that the reading of spiritual books allows us to see and judge ourselves from the height of divine truth. And if, contrary to our usual elevated opinion of ourselves, we find our reflection in that mirror to be unseemly and disfigured by the sores of sin—let us not rise up against the word of God that has revealed our true spiritual condition. After all, it is foolish to shatter the mirror just because it shows our face as stained with filth. Even if we throw away or destroy the mirror, the grime on our face will not disappear—others will still see it. And although we may cease to notice it ourselves, it will remain visible to those close to us—and, most importantly, to our Lord.

If the Lord, through the words of Holy Scripture, has shown us the filth and sores of our spiritual image and thereby exposed our sinful way of life, let us not turn away from that sight, but rather apply ourselves to correction! Our very effort to amend our life will be the fitting expression of gratitude to God for His long-suffering toward our flaws and failings.

Saints such as John Chrysostom and Cyril of Alexandria, Macarius of Egypt, Abba Dorotheos, John of the Ladder, Anthony of the Caves, Nil Sorsky, and countless other holy fathers themselves walked the thorny path of struggle against the passions, and having attained perfection, left behind for our instruction a treasury of soul-saving teachings.

Here are some of the counsels offered by the Holy Fathers to those who sincerely desire to learn how to avoid sin:

1. Always keep the memory of your death and of the future dreadful judgment of God, for this helps greatly in avoiding sin. “He [the Lord] shall judge the world in righteousness, He shall minister judgment to the people in uprightness” (Psalm 9:8).

2. Always keep the fear of God as a guard over your soul—do not allow even thoughts that are displeasing to God, and gradually your desires will align with the will of God.

3. Never neglect the opportunity to attend the church of God. Pray at home daily and conscientiously. Train yourself to attend to the words of prayer with focus, without distraction or wandering thoughts.

4. Keep continual prayer or meditation in your soul—a conversation with God about lofty things and about our life. The ability to maintain constant inward prayer (“mental prayer” or noetic activity²) is the foremost means of guarding oneself against the snares of the evil one.

5. Always be conscious of God’s presence—as though you visibly saw God, His angels, and all the saints watching from heaven. Whatever you do, whatever you think, remember: you are doing and thinking it before the face of God.

6. Be concerned for the salvation of your soul. Learn to practice strict self-attentiveness and sober discernment. Set aside time for the reading of soul-profiting books.

7. Choose for yourself a spiritual father and maintain regular communication with him, striving to seek counsel frequently, especially before making important decisions.

8. Always seek the company of pious people, and avoid the companionship of immoral or deceitful persons—so that you may grow in virtue and, conversely, not unwittingly take on corrupt habits and customs.

9. Always remain occupied with work or some beneficial activity. Do not allow yourself excessive rest, avoid unnecessary pleasures, and struggle against idleness and sloth. Idleness and the habit of indulging in pleasures give rise to many and various sins.

10. Avoid situations and occasions that may lead to sin—the places, persons, things, and activities that provoke temptation or stir sinful desires.

11. Learn to love God. Only he who truly and sincerely loves God will not only avoid sinful acts but will not even entertain an evil thought, for “God is love, and he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God, and God in him” (1 John 4:16).

These and many other priceless treasures of soul-saving counsel and instruction are offered to us in the writings of the Church Fathers—true treasuries of patristic inheritance. Each of us must return to their spiritual wisdom more often.

The Confessor #

The Sacrament of Repentance presupposes that although the penitent confesses his sins to God, he does so in the presence of a priest, who, in this sacrament, acts on behalf of the Lord and even, in a certain sense, takes His place. This priestly mediation in a person’s relationship with God—referred to as spiritual fatherhood—was instituted by the very Son of God, who gave the Apostles the authority to forgive the sins of the penitent, saying: “Receive ye the Holy Ghost. Whosesoever sins ye remit, they are remitted unto them; and whosesoever sins ye retain, they are retained” (John 20:22–23). Thus, the Lord entrusted the ministers of the Church, those who have received apostolic succession, with the authority to free people from the bondage of sin here on earth.

Reflecting on the priest’s role in the Sacrament of Confession, Bishop Mikhail (Semenov) observed that the penitent’s prior spiritual preparation often bears less fruit than the inner work that takes place before the altar of God, in the presence of His minister. To bare before another human being the wounds of one’s conscience and the shame of one’s sins requires a tremendous effort of the will. It is this spiritual breaking, this “crucifying of the conscience by the will,” that should bring about the final and decisive inner transformation that makes a person worthy of grace. That is why it is essential not only to recognize one’s sins before one’s own conscience, but to confess them to God in the presence of a priest.

Between every person who comes to confession and the priest who serves as witness to the repentance and celebrant of the sacrament itself, a relationship of spiritual fatherhood is established. Such a relationship presupposes a high level of mutual trust between the Christian and his spiritual father. Herein lies an important Christian principle: the private life of every believer is not exclusively his own concern but must be placed under the spiritual oversight and guidance of his spiritual father³.

When this practice becomes a normal part of a believer’s life, one may truly hope for success in the Christian life.

Recognizing the saving importance of spiritual fatherhood for every believer, the Church gives each person the right to freely choose a confessor: “Choose for yourself a spiritual father according to your heart,” says one of the instructions found in the Order of Confession.

There are times, however, when a person begins to feel that mutual understanding between him and his spiritual father has been lost. This, of course, is regrettable, but it does not remove the obligation to confess one’s sins. On the contrary, being aware of how zealously the devil seeks to disrupt the harmony of one’s spiritual life, one must make every effort to restore the lost mutual understanding with one’s confessor. If, however, both sides recognize that this understanding has been irreparably lost, and no restoration seems possible, then the question of changing one’s spiritual father may be raised. But one must understand that changing confessors should only be done for serious reasons—not out of a mere reluctance to submit to him or obey his guidance and instructions.

If a person is firmly convinced that he must change his spiritual father, then before going to confession to another priest, he must first receive the blessing of his former confessor and sincerely explain the reasons for this step. Otherwise, such self-willed action would be an expression of disobedience toward God, defiance of Church authority, and would bring no spiritual benefit. One must also remember that when coming to a new confessor, before beginning the actual confession, it is necessary to inform him where, when, and with whom you last confessed, whether you have received Communion, whether you are currently under any restriction from Communion, and whether you have received your previous confessor’s blessing to change spiritual fathers. Only then should one proceed to confession, revealing all former sins—both confessed and unconfessed—as well as those for which a penance was given, and whether that penance has been fulfilled.

In general, once a Christian has chosen a spiritual father, he should entrust his spiritual life to the guidance of that priest and, going forward, confess regularly⁴ to him, diligently striving to fulfill all his spiritual instructions and counsel⁵.

As a rule, a relationship of spiritual fatherhood develops between the priest and the faithful who come to him for confession—a relationship marked by deep mutual trust and spiritual closeness. This relationship implies not only the individual connection between a believer and his confessor, but also a certain degree of spiritual kinship among Christians who share the same spiritual father. After all, they have all chosen this particular shepherd to be their confessor; they share fellowship in prayer and in the resolution of many life matters. Thus, Christians often, when interacting with one another, voluntarily entrust each other with their personal spiritual struggles as an extension of spiritual fatherhood, thereby enriching the sacrament of confession and drawing upon the wisdom of other faithful for support. All of this creates an atmosphere of protection and spiritual consolation that greatly aids in living the Christian life.

Another aspect of spiritual fatherhood is the mutual prayerful care that believers extend to one another. In his prayers during the celebration of the sacraments—especially while serving the Divine Liturgy—and often in his personal prayers at home, the priest remembers all of his spiritual children: the Christians who have chosen him as their spiritual father, who have revealed their sins to him, who have turned to him for healing from the sickness of sin, and who have received from him a spiritual remedy in the form of epitimia (penance). In turn, each Christian should strive to remember his spiritual father daily in his own prayers at home, as well as his fellow believers and loved ones—especially those who have asked for his prayers.

Let us emphasize once again: the commandments of the Church unconditionally require that:

1. Every Christian must have a spiritual father;

2. Every Christian must regularly⁶ come to his spiritual father for confession;

3. Every Christian must build his life in God-pleasing obedience to his spiritual father.

These commandments apply equally to all Orthodox believers. Regarding those who consider themselves Christians yet have no spiritual father, the Order of Confession states plainly and directly: “It would have been better for them not to have been born.” This same view is affirmed by Venerable Abba Dorotheos: “Those who do not have (spiritual) guidance fall like leaves.”

Anyone who has not confessed and does not yet have a spiritual father should urgently set himself the task of choosing a pious priest of right-believing faith and approaching him with the request to hear his confession. Afterward, the two should agree upon a time (and place) for the sacrament to be performed. Yet even after that first confession, one must not fall into false complacency, thinking that all is now accomplished. On the contrary, one must not deprive oneself of the continued saving action of this sacrament.

Participation in the sacrament of confession should be, at the very least, annual for every Christian.

Penance - The Path to the Forgiveness of Sins #

When a person comes to confession and sincerely repents of his sins, in that moment he conquers both the devil and his own vanity—and for this alone he already partially merits forgiveness. But if that person is not aided in his struggle against the sinful passions that caused him to fall, then even after confession he may again become subject to demonic attacks and may easily fall once more into sin, losing what he had gained through repentance the day before. That is why, as a general rule, every person who comes to confession is given a particular assignment, or epitimia⁷, consisting of a task that is both attainable and yet not overly easy, designed to be spiritually beneficial and to strengthen one’s Christian resolve. The form and nature of the epitimia is determined by the spiritual father in each specific case, in accordance with Church tradition and his own pastoral discernment and spiritual experience. If a person diligently fulfills the assigned epitimia, then God’s grace strengthens him in the keeping of the commandments and guards him from the snares of the devil. Confession, when supported by the faithful fulfillment of epitimia, is never fruitless, and always moves a person forward on the path of spiritual growth.

It is important to note that the forgiveness of sins granted during the sacrament of confession is not given merely for a superficial (and at times even thoughtless) admission of guilt—such as: “I’m a sinner, I’ve sinned in everything!”—but because the person, in repenting of his sins, sincerely desires not to return to them and is willing to make real efforts—even sacrifices—in order to carry out that intention. In this sense, epitimia provides us with the opportunity to demonstrate the sincerity of our repentance in action and to labor toward the atonement of our past sins. Therefore, the conscientious fulfillment of epitimia is an essential condition for true forgiveness of sins and for real healing from spiritual illness.

The priest, after hearing the confession and giving necessary counsel, petitions the Lord for the forgiveness of the confessed sins by means of special prayers of absolution that conclude the rite of confession.

However, not all sins committed by a person are necessarily forgiven at the very moment of confession, since some require a certain period and particular conditions of “corrective effort.” On the other hand, the moment of forgiveness for especially grave sins may, at the discretion of the spiritual father, be either hastened or delayed, depending on the severity of the transgressions and the zeal and sincerity of the penitent in striving to amend his life. Christ, in giving His apostles the authority to forgive sins, instructed them thus: “Whosesoever sins ye remit, they are remitted unto them; and whosesoever sins ye retain, they are retained” (John 20:23). In other words, the confessor has been given—fully in accordance with the letter and spirit of the Gospel—the authority not only to forgive sins, but also to withhold forgiveness, for a time. Thus, the receiving of full and final forgiveness is connected, according to the canons of the Church, not solely with the recognition of one’s sin and repentance, but even more so with the person’s actual amendment of life and, at the very least, with a sincere effort to fulfill the epitimia and all other counsel received from the spiritual father during confession.

The goodness of God desires that no one be left without forgiveness—but this forgiveness must be diligently earned by every believer. In other words: if someone, being guilty of sin, refuses to strive or labor for his own correction—can such a one truly be forgiven?

In centuries past, both possibilities—forgiveness and the withholding of forgiveness—were exercised equally often by the Holy Church, and this, without doubt, helped Christians to make real progress in keeping the commandments and living virtuously. Today, unfortunately, many seek various dispensations—often unjustified ones. And this does not pass without consequence for the spiritual condition of contemporary believers. How else can one explain the fact that people who consider themselves respectable Christians sometimes live in such a way that even non-believers find it scandalous?

Therefore, even the final words of absolution pronounced by the priest on behalf of the Lord—“God forgive thee”—are spoken, as it were, in advance: not as “He has already forgiven you,” but rather, “He shall forgive you”—after you have truly corrected your life, and at the very least, after you have conscientiously fulfilled your epitimia.

The meaning of epitimia also lies in this: that by fulfilling it, a person, through his efforts, gradually extinguishes the righteous wrath of God, which was kindled because of his sins, and inclines the Lord toward mercy. In this way, the person journeys toward reconciliation with God.

Obstacles to Repentance #

The enemy of God and man, the devil, strives by all means to deprive people of the Kingdom of God—and first of all, to prevent them from repenting of their sins. And in many cases, he succeeds, especially when we ourselves are negligent or complacent.

First and foremost, the devil tries to persuade a person that he has no “particular” sins for which he needs to “especially” repent. After all, many people—no matter how they actually live—always consider themselves “no worse than others”: “Let them (criminals, murderers, thieves, atheists, etc.) repent! But I haven’t killed anyone, I haven’t robbed anyone… And I sin like everyone else…” Yes, these are often the very words with which people begin their confession when they come to repentance for the first time.

But when the priest begins to ask questions, it suddenly turns out that out of ten questions asked at random, the person confesses to nine: “Yes, I’ve done that sin.” So then—is it really true that we have nothing to repent of? Of course not! The problem is not the absence of sins, but our unwillingness to recognize and see them in our lives. “If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He (the Lord) is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:8–9). It is truly a fearful thing not to see one’s own sinfulness—for the saving door of repentance remains closed to such people. And without sincere contrition, there can be no forgiveness.

To others, however, the devil suggests the opposite lie: that they have sinned so greatly that they can no longer even hope for forgiveness. Such a person is often prone to exaggerate his sins, and this too is harmful, for by unjustly considering himself “utterly lost,” he makes no effort to change his life—and for that reason alone, he may truly perish. Sometimes such thoughts lead a person into depression or despair, which in itself is a sin, and moreover becomes a barrier to sincere repentance. That is why we must firmly remember: through the mercy of God, any sin can be forgiven, and there is no sin for which repentance is either impossible or useless! Our task is to honestly acknowledge our sins, sincerely repent of them, accept epitimia with humility, and patiently labor toward our correction.

Another person, seeing and acknowledging his sins, understanding the necessity of repentance, becomes embarrassed by the shamefulness of his deeds: “How can I possibly speak of this to a priest?” Concerning this false shame—planted by the devil during confession—Venerable Ephraim the Syrian speaks convincingly: “You are ashamed and blush when you must confess your sins. Be ashamed rather to sin than to confess. Consider: if confession is not made here, everything will be confessed THERE (at the Last Judgment) before all the universe. Where is the greater torment? Where is the greater shame? In deeds⁸ we are bold and shameless, but when it comes time to confess, we are ashamed and delay.” Therefore, when we come to confession, we must overcome this false shame and openly confess every sin to the priest, without trying to justify or excuse ourselves.

Just as excessive shame is inappropriate during confession, so too is undue casualness. It sometimes happens that a person’s confession resembles a “report on work accomplished” rather than actual repentance. But when we come to confession, we must repent of our sins—not merely recite them dispassionately, like listing the names of train stations glimpsed through a window. It is essential that we not only recount our sins to our confessor—holding nothing back—but that we also reflect seriously on the degree of our personal guilt in them. And if we do not yet feel sorrow or remorse for our sins—if we do not feel guilt in our soul—then we must begin by confessing this very fact: our lack of fear of God and our unrepentant state.

There are those who, preparing for confession, decide: “I’ll say this, but I won’t say that.” This is another common and grave mistake. Just as it is impossible to be healed of a physical illness without showing the doctor the afflicted part or revealing the true cause of the disease, so in confession we must hide nothing—from God or from the priest. Willful concealment of a sin is a lie—and therefore another sin—and this deceit often leads to yet more sins, worsening our responsibility before God⁹. So if we have made up our minds to confess, let us make sure not to hide a single sin¹⁰! But if, this time, someone lacks the courage to confess a certain sin, then he must: first, earnestly pray to God that death not overtake him unconfessed—before he finds the strength to repent fully and completely—and second, diligently prepare himself so that next time he may overcome himself and confess not only that unconfessed sin, but also the fact that it had previously been hidden¹¹.

Some think this way: “I went to confession, I repented—but then I sinned again. Why should I go again? I’ll get better first, and then I’ll come back to confess…” It seems like a noble intention. But if we, having once repented, still could not overcome a sin, then our amendment is unlikely to happen on its own later either. Such reasoning exposes our prideful self-reliance—and it is very unrealistic.

Others ask: how soon should one go to confession if they sin again? One could respond by asking: how many times should a person get up if he stumbles and falls while walking? The answer is obvious. As many times as we fall, we must rise again—and since we sin continually, repentance must likewise be a regular practice. And the reason we so often fail to improve is that we have not applied sufficient effort or diligence. So when we confess again—this time repenting of repeated sins—we should, together with our spiritual father, examine their roots and causes even more carefully. Having received a fitting epitimia, and having attentively listened to the priest’s counsel, we should strive even more earnestly toward correction—for then, any sinful habit will, sooner or later, inevitably be overcome. It is important to understand that without the Church’s prayerful support and the guidance of a spiritual father, one rarely succeeds in correcting one’s life.

Sometimes a person who wishes to repent is held back by awkwardness—he doesn’t know how to behave, either in church in general or during confession in particular. But these are merely petty fears, which should be cast aside completely. If you don’t know the Church’s customs, simply behave as modestly as possible, and patiently ask other believers about everything, showing humility and willingness to be taught.

Every priest remembers the words of the Lord: “Him that cometh to Me I will in no wise cast out.” Therefore, if you approach a priest with a request to receive you for confession, your intention will most certainly be fulfilled¹². And if, for some reason, you must wait a little while—accept this with humility, as a test of the firmness of your resolve. And already beforehand, begin turning to the Lord for help and begin to pray, preparing yourself for this most essential work for the salvation of the soul—repentance.

Being mindful of the many obstacles raised by the devil along the path to repentance, we must take care not only for ourselves but also for our loved ones, who perhaps have not yet succeeded in overcoming these hindrances. We must not pass up any opportunity to call our family, friends, and acquaintances to repentance—again and again—always remembering that “without repentance there is no salvation.”

If you learn, for instance, that someone you know or are related to has fallen ill, and you know that they have not been to confession for a long time, then your Christian duty is to take some responsibility for the care of their soul and help them to repent of their sins before God. We must remember: the most terrifying thing for a Christian is to die without repentance for one’s sins!

First and foremost, do all you can to convince the sick person of the necessity of confession. If he agrees, you must contact a priest as soon as possible and arrange for the sacrament of confession—whether at church, in the person’s home, in a nursing facility, or in a hospital (even in an intensive care unit). Today, thank God, confession can be performed virtually anywhere, and almost every institution will allow a priest to visit a sick person.

But of course, in caring for relatives and loved ones who are slow to come to confession, one should not wait until they are visited by a grave illness. To speak to them and remind them about repentance is our daily duty—it is a natural expression of mercy and loving care¹³.

Holy Communion #

The greatest spiritual benefit for our salvation is found in the Sacrament of the Communion of the Holy Mysteries of Christ—the Holy Eucharist—celebrated during the Divine Liturgy¹⁴. Christ Himself speaks of the necessity of partaking of the Holy Mysteries in order to receive salvation and eternal life: “Verily, verily, I say unto you: Except ye eat the Flesh of the Son of Man, and drink His Blood, ye have no life in you. Whoso eateth My Flesh and drinketh My Blood hath eternal life; and I will raise him up at the last day.” (John 6:53–54)

The saving fruits of Communion in the Holy Mysteries are as follows:

• growth in the spiritual life through the increased activity of divine grace;

• the discovery of the true meaning of one’s life in the faith of Christ;

• the most intimate union with the Lord—in spirit and in thought;

• the pledge of the future Resurrection and eternal life.

From the earliest times, the Holy Church has taken great care to ensure that Christians receive Holy Communion only after proper preparation—for otherwise, it may bring not spiritual benefit, but harm to the soul¹⁵. It is widely accepted that every Christian who desires to partake of the Holy Communion must, at a minimum, have faithfully observed the fasts and fasting days throughout the preceding year, have performed daily prayers consistently, and have no unrepented or unforgiven sins (i.e., sins not yet confessed or absolved through prayer).

When preparing to receive Holy Communion¹⁶, it is advisable to receive a blessing from one’s spiritual father for the period of preparation (goveniye)¹⁷, and also to seek his guidance on how best to prepare: when, how long, and in what manner to fast and pray, and on which day to come for confession. Then, during confession, one should receive a blessing for Holy Communion and confirm the specific day on which to partake of the Holy Mysteries.

The importance which the Holy Fathers placed on participation in the sacrament of Communion can be seen in the words of St. John Chrysostom, who wrote that the person who does not strive to receive the Holy Mysteries of Christ at least three times a year “lives like a beast and does not care for his salvation.” Those believers who, year after year, indifferently deprive themselves of Communion because of the unacceptable sinfulness of their way of life—and who make no effort to change—thereby deprive themselves of God’s help, cut themselves off from the life of the Church, and, if they do not repent, risk the final ruin of their souls. On the other hand, those who strive to receive Communion at all costs, yet fail to make a serious effort to become truly worthy of this great gift, likewise bring no benefit to their soul—for the grace-filled power of the Sacrament of the Eucharist operates only in those who approach Communion worthily: with repentance, prayer, and a contrite heart.

Questions for Confession #

Have you ever been to confession? (To whom, and for what reason did you decide to change your spiritual father?)

Are you currently under any prohibition from your spiritual father, and are you fulfilling his penance?

Do you believe in the Lord God?

Do you venerate the Most Holy God-bearer and the holy servants of God?

Have you ever renounced God¹⁸, or called yourself an unbeliever (even if only in words)?

Do you have the fear of God? Are you preparing yourself for the future answer before God¹⁹?

Do you blaspheme against God, the Church, holy icons, the Divine Scriptures, or any other sacred thing²⁰?

Do you always wear a cross on your person²¹?

Do you consult witches, whisperers, folk healers, psychics, or any sort of sorcerers²²?

Do you consult horoscopes, do you yourself practice divination, or ask others to tell your fortune²³?

Do you honor the Church feasts, and do you attend church on those days?

Do you work on feast days and Sundays, or profane these days with unworthy deeds or amusements?

Do you always observe the proper Christian customs in prayer²⁴?

Have you prayed together with heretics (those of another confession), or in their temples, or in places where pious customs of prayer are not kept?

Have you ever participated in heretical rites—Communion, baptism, marriage, or other such things?

Do you always say the appointed prayers—morning and evening, before and after meals? Do you ever leave yourself, even on certain days, entirely without prayer?

Do you remember and keep the penance and other counsels of your spiritual father²⁵?

Do you pay the Church tithe²⁶?

Have you ever cursed someone, or has anyone else ever cursed you²⁷?

Have you ever sworn by God, by heaven, by the earth, by your life, or anything else? Do you have such a habit?

Have you ever committed murder, even unintentionally? Have you ever beaten someone with your own hands or by consent? Have you been guilty of another’s death? Have you ever consented to an abortion²⁸?

Have you engaged in robbery, theft, or stealing? Have you unjustly taken another’s property through corrupt judgment?

Have you ever betrayed anyone? Have you slandered anyone?

Do you harbor enmity or resentment against anyone? Do you wish evil upon anyone? Do you forgive those who have wronged you, and do you refrain from vengeance?

Do you steal? Have you ever taken what was not yours (even state property or something you found)? Have you ever deceived anyone in financial dealings?

Do you profit from others’ misfortunes? Do you have any unjust income (from sinful activity)?

Have you ever stolen anything from a church, from a cemetery, or taken any sacred objects?

Are you attached to money? Do you take bribes? Are you overly stingy in your dealings? Do you share your possessions with your kin?

Do you use foul language or other abusive speech? Do you have a habit of consigning others to the devil, saying things like, “Go to h…”?

Do you give in to anger? Do you speak evil of others? Do you quarrel?

Do you place too much importance on food? Have you ever eaten to the point of pain, or to the point of vomiting?

Do you smoke tobacco? Do you consider it an innocent pastime?²⁹

Do you get drunk on wine? Do you drink to the point of madness, blackout, or vomiting? Do you come to work or to church in a drunken state?

Have you ever tried drugs (even once)? Have you taken part in any activities involving them, or in conversations about them?

Do you give in to the sin of pride? Do you have ambitious or vain thoughts? Do you exalt yourself above others? Do you cling too strongly to the memory of your own merits and advantages?

Do you lie or conceal the truth? Do you ever knowingly assent to falsehood?

Do you entertain lustful thoughts or desires? Do you take delight in indecent spectacles or read seductive literature?

Do you give in to lustful thoughts? Do you defile yourself with unclean touches? Do you engage in obscene conversations or associate with lewd people?

Are you living in lawful (church-blessed) marriage with your spouse? Do you preserve the sanctity of marriage, and do you remain faithful?

Do you engage in physical perversions? Have you committed fornication (sodomitical, with animals, or other perversions)?

Do you teach your children (or grandchildren) Christian customs? Do you set an example of a pious life? Do you spoil them?

Do you keep the fasts on Wednesdays and Fridays?

Do you observe all four fasts throughout the year?

Do you harbor envy? Do you envy unrighteous wealth or sinful happiness?

Do you judge others in conversation or in thought?

For women: Do you dye or cut your hair? Do you use cosmetics? Do you cover your head with a veil in church and during prayer? Do you wear men’s clothing?³⁰

For men: Do you shave or trim your beard and mustache? Do you grow or dye your hair like women?

Do you always wear clothing that is modest and fitting for a Christian?³¹

Do you play cards or other games of chance (including computer games) or gamble with money?

Are you fond of worldly music? Do you spend time watching television or engaging in other useless entertainments? Do you refrain from such things at least during the fasts?

Do you give such alms as you are able to the Church and to those in need? Do you visit the sick?

Do you complain against God? Do you have patience and humility before the Will of God? Do you strive to prefer His Will over your own desire?

Have you led anyone into sin? Have you advised anyone to commit a sinful act?

Have you concealed any sin during this confession or a previous one? Have you ever advised someone to conceal their sin?

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